Dear Friends,
Our petition drive goes well. Although many of us have difficulty lifting pens, we have, through sacrifice and perseverance, signed our names to the document that, we hope, will prompt the voluntary recall of our do-nothing Commissioner.
But in opportunity, danger lurks. In these critical hours for our political process, it is vital that we keep our heads and resist the temptation to take shortcuts.
Over the past few days, I have heard many of you discussing impeachment as an option. I cannot caution you strongly enough: this is not a productive strategy. Because of the Oyster's negligence, we have no established court system, and no legislature. Impeachment is a kind of trial, and we have no judge to hear our charges. We have no legal authority to impeach the Oyster. The best that we can do is make our displeasure manifest, and, through the pressure of a legitimacy crisis, appeal to the better angels of the Oyster's nature to step, or roll, down.
I hold no elected office. Like you, I am but a concerned citizen of the Box. I can only use the tools of a concerned citizen; I cannot pretend to possess tools I do not have. We can circulate a petition; we cannot employ a judicial procedure that we have neither the apparatus nor the precedent for.
I urge you to keep the faith. We can effect the change we want to see, but we must remain steadfast, and we must remain civil.
With affection and resolve,
The Spring Chicken
Monday, October 25, 2010
Sunday, October 10, 2010
The Time is Now
Dear Concerned Citizens,
We have all held our tongues long enough.
On 8/5, the world changed. None among us will forget that day of unspeakable terror -- especially not while the Destroyer still stalks what used to be our peaceful Playt field. Assaults on members of our community continue unabated, and unanswered. We know now that we are all at risk, and the price of our survival is eternal and exhausting vigilance.
While the Playt Tournament occupied our attention, and we were all merry, it was easy to ignore the threats we face. Now, in a time of crisis, we are confronted by a harsh reality: our leadership is not equal to the challenge. We expected a comprehensive plan from The Oyster; we got incoherence. We expected an address; we got silence. We expected compassion; we found only disengagement. Safely ensconced in its gated community, The Oyster remained deaf to our desperate cries for help.
My friends, this must not stand. When peril kicks at the door, radical measures to defend our home become necessary. If the current administration is incapable of safeguarding our welfare, we must use all legal means within our power to replace it with one that will.
The Luminescent Cow -- my colleague and loving spouse -- will be circulating a petition for the recall of The Oyster from its position as Playt commissioner. We are in uncharted territory here: we have never had a recall drive in our community before, and I am somewhat doubtful that The Oyster, unresponsive (and frequently inebriated), as it is, will even bother to recognize our efforts. But it is my hope that, confronted with the will of those it purports to govern, the current commissioner will make way for one better equipped to handle the challenges of a post 8/5 world.
Yours in friendship and hope,
The Spring Chicken
We have all held our tongues long enough.
On 8/5, the world changed. None among us will forget that day of unspeakable terror -- especially not while the Destroyer still stalks what used to be our peaceful Playt field. Assaults on members of our community continue unabated, and unanswered. We know now that we are all at risk, and the price of our survival is eternal and exhausting vigilance.
While the Playt Tournament occupied our attention, and we were all merry, it was easy to ignore the threats we face. Now, in a time of crisis, we are confronted by a harsh reality: our leadership is not equal to the challenge. We expected a comprehensive plan from The Oyster; we got incoherence. We expected an address; we got silence. We expected compassion; we found only disengagement. Safely ensconced in its gated community, The Oyster remained deaf to our desperate cries for help.
My friends, this must not stand. When peril kicks at the door, radical measures to defend our home become necessary. If the current administration is incapable of safeguarding our welfare, we must use all legal means within our power to replace it with one that will.
The Luminescent Cow -- my colleague and loving spouse -- will be circulating a petition for the recall of The Oyster from its position as Playt commissioner. We are in uncharted territory here: we have never had a recall drive in our community before, and I am somewhat doubtful that The Oyster, unresponsive (and frequently inebriated), as it is, will even bother to recognize our efforts. But it is my hope that, confronted with the will of those it purports to govern, the current commissioner will make way for one better equipped to handle the challenges of a post 8/5 world.
Yours in friendship and hope,
The Spring Chicken
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